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Facing Your Fear

FEAR - we all have it, no one likes it. So what to do about it? Well, there's
a difference between fear and a genuine concern. A genuine concern is, 'I'm
concerned about passing my exams next month', which is a rational response and
may even help in my setting goals to make sure I do pass them. Fear on the
other hand can be extremely debilitating. In Hypnotherapy we would say it's a
psychosomatic response to a negative expectation. faith, is the opposite. With
fear we get a rush of adrenaline into our bodies, not very healthy most of the
time. With faith, we get a rush or endorphins, the good guys, making us feel
good because we have a positive expectancy to our outcome, whether it be,
passing a driving test, making a presentation or having a great day off!

So how can you face your fears? Well actually, just being aware of them is
half way there. First take a look at what your fear is, is it rational? For
example, fearing that your partner may leave you, when you have nothing to
really base that on ('cos you're getting along just great) could be irrational
after all, there's not grounds for this thinking, however, partners do leave,
and it would be Utopian and unrealistic to think they don't.

If it's not irrational but something more reasonable, e.g. fear your yearly
review won't go well and you won't get the promotion you really want, then ask:
Is there anything I can do about it NOW? Maybe there is, like work more
efficiently, always be on time, whatever, if you think it would genuinely make a
difference, do it. End of problem. If there isn't because it's in 3 days and
you've done 'jack' to earn it, then change your response to it. Instead of
losing sleep, going over it in your head, and wearing yourself out. Realise
there is nothing you can do about it, and that it's not going to kill you. If
you're not going to get that promotion or you are, it's out of your hands, so
for a few days, shove it to the back of your mind and enjoy a stressfree time
until the day, then you can stress if you want, (but not advisable). So, you
may start to realise by now, you have a CHOICE. That great word again.

So how would you like to feel?

Here are a few questions you might want to experiment with today. Think of a
'fear', if you haven't got any, apply it to a mild anxiety you have. If you
want, you may like to try scoring yourself 1-10, where 1 is total weakness and
10 is total strength.

Ask yourself am I having this problem because...

a.. I don't know what to do? (information)
b.. I know what to do but don't feel capable of doing it? (Skill)
c.. I don't believe it can be done? (Belief/Possibility)
d.. Other people stand in my way? (Other people, careful you are not
'blaming' though)
e.. I don't give a flying duck ? (Motivation)
f.. I don't have time? (Time)
g.. I don't have the money (Money)
h.. I'm scared (Fear)

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